Saturday, April 18, 2009

You might be getting older if.....

Getting older is definitely an inevitable phenomenon that is happening……

You might be getting older if………

* You have a little chain on your glasses to keep from losing them, even if it’s a pretty handmade one that you refer to as jewelry.
* When you drive at night you have to wear glasses to keep from mistaking mailboxes for hitchhikers.
* You can drive in the daytime without your glasses but can’t read the signs.
* You have to turn the TV up full blast to hear it and everyone in the family yells at you to turn it down and says you really need to have your ears checked.
* You could carrying heavy things but ask your kids for help anyway.
* You imagine that every ache or pain is a heart attack or stroke.
* Some of your teeth have hairline cracks in them because you chewed ice during pregnancy and they had to be pulled here and there over the years, and now you have a ridiculously expensive little tray of falsies that you pop in and out of your mouth.
* Your hair is thinning and turning grey. It’s distinguished if you’re a man. If you’re a woman it’s not.
* Everyone calls you Mrs. or Mr., not just the friends of your kids.
* You have to stretch everyday, as in have to.
* Instead of jumping out of the bathtub, you awkwardly roll onto your stomach to use your hands to push up onto your knees, and then, holding the side of the tub with one steadying hand, you stand up and step out.
* There are little people in your life who call you Grandma.

Anybody out there have anything to add to the list?


7 comments:

Margo said...

I think you've pretty well covered it for me so far today. Once my brain gets going (assuming it will?), I'll get back to you :)
Here's one: When you seriously are thinking about moving into a one story house just to avoid stairs.

Artist Victoria O'Neill said...

ha ha, yes i have thought of that one too!

Cascia Talbert said...

I don't have anything to add to the list but you made some great points! Thank you for the laugh!

Mandala Michelle said...

This one was my favorite...
"Instead of jumping out of the bathtub, you awkwardly roll onto your stomach to use your hands to push up onto your knees..."

For me, it was when I went to buy this cute, fashionable little blouse for myself and the girly at the counter asked me if it was for my daughter.

supplies overflowing! said...

you get laughed at when you get up during a commercial to get something from the kitchen- cause your way of hurrying to do this involves slowly getting to an upright position as you hobble out of the room going ow ow ow ow.

Artist Victoria O'Neill said...

the blouse story is an eye opener. and love the ow ow ow!

Artgalcrafts said...

Hi Victoria, just saw this, and my own recognition of getting older among all you have said, is when I call everyone Love!.It just slips out. Never use to. Makes one feel old.
Your comments are very funny but true, We call it having a senoir moment!
Love
Elizabeth k.